Turning 45: A Grateful Badass
Today, I hit the big 4-5, and you know what? I’m feeling pretty damn fabulous about it! This milestone gives me a chance to reflect on my life, and I’m genuinely grateful for the wild ride that’s brought me here. Life is what you make of it, and I’m ready to tackle this next chapter with all the grit and determination I can muster.
I’m a fiercely proud mom of four amazing kids—my Krew—who keep me on my toes every single day. Let me tell you, becoming a mother at 20 was one hell of a ride! Each one of them has their own unique personality, with the best pieces of myself in each of them. Navigating the beautiful chaos they create is an adventure I wouldn’t trade for anything. They challenge me in ways I never saw coming, pushing me to rethink what I thought I knew about life, love, and myself. They inspire me to dig deeper and remind me that life is all about growth and resilience. Sure, there are plenty of laughs along the way—often accompanied by a few tears—but every moment is a testament to the wild, messy, and utterly rewarding journey of motherhood. Watching them evolve into their own incredible selves is like witnessing a beautiful tapestry unfold, and I’m grateful to be part of their story
And then there’s my granddaughter. Holy hell, becoming a grandmother has flipped my world upside down. I never expected to love someone this fiercely, but holding her is like opening up a floodgate of emotions I didn’t know existed. It’s raw, it’s wild, and it’s changed everything for me. Watching her grow makes me appreciate my own mother even more. I finally see the strength it takes to love like this, and it’s a fierce reminder of the legacy we share. Embracing my role as a grandmother is a wild ride, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
Now, let’s talk about my husband. He’s pretty damn amazing. Building a relationship with my kids took time. It’s a testament to what a great “Nacho Average Step-Dad” he is. He’s been my rock, accepting me with all my quirks and complexities, and he tries his hardest every day. That effort speaks volumes about his character and how deeply he cares.
I’ve got siblings who keep it real. They ALL see me as the hardass I am, but they also know that underneath this tough exterior, I’m human. When I crack and become a pile of mush, they’re always there to catch me. My amazing friends play a similar role; they know how to make me laugh, even on my toughest days. We share unforgettable moments, and they remind me that while I might be a tough cookie, I still need a little sugar now and then.
Let’s not forget my spoiled brat of a dog, who adds a layer of chaos to my life. She’s got more energy than I can handle sometimes, but her antics remind me to embrace joy—even if it comes in the form of a furry tornado.
I've always worn my hardass title with pride. It’s not just about being tough; it’s about the unwavering spirit that’s gotten me through a lot. Bowling and playing softball for over 20 years taught me resilience and determination. Those competitive days shaped who I am today.
Tattoos? I’ve got more than my dad ever wanted, each one telling a story and marking a significant moment in my life. They’re badges of honor, symbols of my victories and struggles, each inked design representing a chapter in my journey. There’s the kaleidoscope of butterflies on my leg, a reflection of my transformation—reminding me of the time I broke free from my comfort zone and truly started embracing who I am. Then there’s the quote on my forearm, 'Stay The Course'— My ex-husband and I got this matching tattoos and agreed to never cover them up, as they symbolize a shared journey that remains a part of our individual paths, despite no longer being together. Each tattoo is more than just ink; it’s a testament to my resilience and growth. They remind me that my quirks, my past, and every part of my journey contribute to the vibrant tapestry of my life, showcasing the beautiful, messy, and unapologetically real woman I’ve become.
As I turn 45, I’m learning to accept those age-related changes. Bifocals became my go-to a while back, and it’s a straightforward reminder that time waits for no one. I wear my age with pride; each wrinkle and laugh line tells the story of the battles I’ve fought. They’re evidence of the experiences that have shaped me, and I embrace them as signs of strength.
As I get ready to blow out the candles on my birthday cake—assuming my house doesn’t catch fire first—I can’t help but think about how much of the "kool-aid" I’ve drunk to be so open about my faith. Spoiler alert: I’m still Madge, the same snarky, fun-loving woman you’ve always known. This new season has brought a sense of freedom that’s hard to ignore, and I hope you’ll still accept me for me.
My faith in Jesus is a cornerstone of my life. It’s a driving force that shapes my decisions and actions. This year feels like a turning point—an opportunity to embrace the power of faith and show others it’s never too late to believe in something bigger than ourselves. I want to encourage everyone to find their path, no matter where they are.
So, here’s to another year of living authentically, with a side of sass and a whole lot of love! Here’s to turning 45, leaning on my faith, and kicking ass in the years to come!
Madge
